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Presenting A Way To Introduce Guns N’ Roses To Your Child Without All That Cussing And Drug-Referencing

091021 lullaby 120x120 Presenting A Way To Introduce Guns N’ Roses To Your Child Without All That Cussing And Drug ReferencingLooks like the next big demographic to be exploited is “youngish parents with hard-rock pasts who don’t want to kill their cool factor with Raffi CDs”: A company called Rockabye Baby has just released Lullaby Renditions Of Guns N’ Roses, a 12-track album that transforms the hedonistic hits of the notorious band into songs that can help quiet children. Fortunately (or not?), concerned parents won’t need to explain what “with your bitch slap rappin’ and your cocaine tongue, you get nothing done” means, since all the lullaby versions have been stripped of their lyrics and transformed into “gentle renditions of GNR’s metal classics” that are all-instrumental. The track listing (which does include “You Could Be Mine,” oh yes):


01. Welcome To The Jungle
02. Sweet Child O’ Mine
03. Paradise City
04. Live & Let Die
05. November Rain
06. You Could Be Mine
07. Mr. Brownstone
08. Estranged
09. Yesterdays
10. Don’t Cry
11. Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door
12. Patience


The official site has sound samples. “Sounds like the music from Myst got inseminated by one of those ‘_____ band as played by four cellos’ albums that were a fad for a bit in like 2003,” my pal Chris Steffen said to me after scrolling through a few of them. But I think “Mr. Brownstone” actually sounds kind of pretty, which makes me wonder if it’ll eventually result in inuring children to the horrors of heroin? Guess we’ll find out in about 15-18 years!


Lullaby Renditions of Guns N’ Roses [Rockabye Baby Music via GNRDaily]

 

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