Did somebody finally make good on their Internet threats to punch Pete Wentz in the face? The Fall Out Boy dude posted some creepy photos on his blog showing his face bloody and cut as though he were auditioning for a Fight Club sequel. Always one to drum up some mystery, Pete also included a multiple choice test for readers to guess what happened rather than him just flat-out telling us. The 21-choices-long list, as well as one bonus bloody pic, after the jump.
Yesterday Pete tweeted: “Weirdness is happening in my life right now,” following it up an hour later with, “Holy f I look like frankenstein.” So what happened? Perhaps it included Decaydance labelmate Gabe Saporta of Cobra Starship might have an idea, as he wrote to Wentz: “@petewentz I love that the stewardess thought we were a gay couple b/c I was cleaning the blood off yr face. Hope the stitches hold up.”
Here are our provided clues, courtesy of Wentz:
Choose your own excuse to advance the story!!!
My face was badly bludgeoned because….
A) Latenight game of “face jousting” gone horribly right.
B) Called Perez a gay slur.
C) Called Will.I.Am “Perez.”
D) In a Nyquil-induced haze I confused my own reflection with my estranged brother, David Archuletta. Ran into mirror full-speed.
E) I was wasted. You should see the other guy.
F) Forgot to thaw turkey before deep-frying.
G) Realized my sex appeal was getting in the way of my art, like Brad Pitt and Matt Damon.
H) Watched “Fight Club” in like, super hi-def dude.
J) Overzealous “Face Insurance” salesman just trying to make a point.
K) Realized Rollingstone said i was the r. patz of 2005. What year is it now? Im fucked.
L) Literally fought for a Midtown reunion.
M) Fell for the old “face-wash/sulfuric acid switcheroo.”
N) Watched “The View” without protection.
O) Starring in community theatre retelling of “Edward Scissorhands.”
P) Emo “self” Mutilation.
Q) Bathroom door.
R) “Hiatus” is over or has officially begun. Head hurts to much to remember.
S) Read and believed all the comments on the internet. Followed the instructions.
T) Lease up on old face.
U) Keep meaning to cut Bronx’s nails.
Our guess? Probably the first option—late-night face jousting seems right up Pete’s alley, especially since he’s been known to willingly fling himself into dangerous situations where his body plays the victim. (Although we can’t count high enough to tell you how much money we’d lay down to see a community theatre version of Edward Scissorhands starring Pete.)
You might also like