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Archive for the ‘Funny’ Category

Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”

450c4dde682f5a042af57805abf41b09 Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”

Daniel Patrick Boyd, his two sons and four other men from North Carolina are accused of military-style training at home and plotting “violent jihad” through a series of terror attacks abroad, federal authorities said Monday. Read more on this story below.

Authorities said the group was being led by Daniel Patrick Boyd, a married 39-year-old who lived in an unassuming lakeside home in a rural area south of Raleigh, North Carolina.  The family appeared to be like any normal family that walked their dog and operated a drywall business.

But twenty years ago, Boyd, who is a U.S. citizen, trained in terrorist camps in Pakistan and Afghanistan and fought against the Soviets for three years before his return to the United States.

An indictment released Monday didn’t detail the terrorist plans or targets overseas, but it claims some of the defendants traveled to Israel in 2007 with the intent of waging “violent jihad” and returned home without success.

“These charges hammer home the point that terrorists and their supporters are not confined to the remote regions of some far away land but can grow and fester right here at home,” U.S. Attorney George E.B. Holding said. He would not give details of the alleged plots beyond what was in a news release and indictment.

The seven men appeared in a Raleigh court on Monday, charged with providing material support to terrorism. If convicted, they could face life in prison. Court documents charged that Boyd, also known as ‘Saifullah,’ encouraged others to engage in jihad.

Boyd and his brother were convicted of  bank robbery in Pakistan back in 1991, and were accused of carrying identification showing they belonged to the radical Afghan guerrilla group, Hezb-e-Islami, or Party of Islam. Both brothers were sentenced to have a foot and a hand cut off for the robbery, but the decision was later overturned.

Their wives told The Associated Press in an interview at the time that the couples had U.S. roots but the United States was a country of “kafirs”—Arabic for heathens.

Two of the suspects are Daniel Patrick Boyd’s sons: Zakariya Boyd, 20 and Dylan Boyd, 22. The others are Anes Subasic, 33; Mohammad Omar Aly Hassan, 22; and Ziyad Yaghi, 21. Hysen Sherifi, 24, a native of Kosovo and a U.S. legal permanent was also charged in the case. He was the only person arrested who was not a U.S. citizen.

The wife of a North Carolina man charged with plotting violent jihad says they are an “ordinary family” and care about other human begins.

Sabrina Boyd said in a statement issued through the Muslim American Society in Raleigh that the charges against her husband, 39-year-old Daniel Patrick Boyd, have not been proven.

The seven men appeared in court in Raleigh on Monday, charged with providing material support to terrorism and “conspiracy to murder, kidnap, maim and injure persons abroad.” They’re scheduled to appear again Thursday for a detention hearing.

Click thumbnails for larger pictures


2c508553f298d6d2baf36732daab6b21 Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”
ae96bd58dee2b327066914d3510c440f Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”
4216d39ddeb826dff6d27fae8283a706 Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”
bdb500c8e9e6f415e2b48b0720ed17e5 Daniel Patrick Boyd (Photo) & Six Other N.C. Men Plotting “Violent Jihad”



 

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Shoplifter Blames Crime on Irritable Bowel Syndrome

CAPE CORAL, Fla. (AP) – A woman arrested for shoplifting has blamed the crime on irritable bowel syndrome, authorities said. Helen Gallo, 61, of Clearwater, was arrested Sunday after allegedly shoplifting from a Cape Coral grocery store, The Daily Breeze of Cape Coral reported.

Gallo told the authorities she couldn’t wait in line due to irritable bowel syndrome.

She’s being charged with petit larceny and was released Sunday from jail on a $500 bond.

If she’s telling the truth about having IBS, why didn’t she just leave the items at the store?

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Man Admits to Stealing Shoes Off Women’s Feet

A British man has admitted to stealing shoes right off of women’s feet in public.

Omar Abd-el-Gowd, 26, who said he’d had a shoe fetish since he was 12, admitted to a total of eight robberies in London between December 2005 and November 2006.

He’s being charged with sexual assault by one of his victims, but has denied the allegations.

Gowd told a London jury that he had approached victims from behind, quickly lifted up one of their feet and ran off with one of their shoes. He claimed he barely recalled the details of the women he had attacked, but could completely remember their shoes.

Creepy.

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Washington Home Emptied After Craigslist Ad Gave the OK

A fake ad posted last weekend on Craigslist led to property being stripped off of a rental home in Tacoma, Washington.

“In the ad, it said come and take what you want. Everything is free,” Landlord Laurie Raye said.

She had cleaned out the house after evicting a tenant.

Not long after the ad appeared, neighbors saw strangers taking items away. They made off with a sink, light fixtures, the hot water heater, a vinyl window and the front door.

Raye said Craigslist told her they would need a subpoena or search warrant before they could release information about who posted the ad.

Police Detective Gretchen Ellis said: “We’ve had prostitution things happen, rental scams, fraudulent activity. In this case, it appeared the items were going to be given away, but they were not.”

I have a feeling the evicted tenant did it for revenge.

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Pranksters Glue Doors Shut at California High School

Friday, a day before spring break, pranksters covered the locks on all the exterior gates and doors at Carlsbad High School with super-strength glue.

“A teacher who always gets there early called me on my cell phone and said, ‘Guess what?’” said Carlsbad High School principal Margaret Stanchi. “But I didn’t guess this.”

About 100 doors had been completely sealed before the first staff arrived at around 6:30 a.m. at the San Diego high school.

Custodial staff were able to quickly unseal the lock on a building with 27 classrooms. The rest of the 3000 students had to sit in the gym until their classrooms were unlocked, one by one.

The school had a survellance video but it proved useless and didn’t give any clues as to who dunnit.

Police are still investigating.

Nice prank. It must have taken a long time for the person(s) to do it though.

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School District Gets $250 Bill for Porn

School district officials at Union City, New Jersey were shocked when their February cable bill showed $250 worth of pay-per-view adult programs.

There are five cable boxes in the Board of Education building and one was used to order the porn after business hours. The films where priced at $4.95 to $9.95 per view.

So that means about 25 to 50 adult films had been watched that month.

The district’s cable provider, Cablevision gave them a full refund and is also helping with the investigation. Authorities have removed three of the five boxes. The other two are in the superintendent and assistant superintendent’s offices.

I’m guessing it was the janitor or a security guard. Or an employee who liked to work overtime in the name of free porn.

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Saudi Man Attacked Over Threat to Wed Third Wife

A Saudi man lost a bit of his nose in a joint assault by his two wives after he jokingly threatened to marry a third woman.

Judaie Ibn Salem had thought his threat would help resolve an argument over dividing up his house.

“I swore that I would do it because … they were impolite and that’s when I came under an even bigger attack,” Ibn Salem told Shams newspaper after having seven stitches inserted.

“I never realised they would get so worked up. But the only way to restore my dignity is really to take a third wife.

“I don’t know what I’m going to lose next if I do that.”

Islamic law allows men to take up to four wives and polygamy is not unusual in the conservative kingdom of Saudi Arabia, the birthplace of Islam.

It’s pretty messed up that Islamic men can have many wifes and the women can only have one husband. I’m glad the women fought against the idea.

If he knows what’s good for him, he won’t go through with another marriage otherwise he could lose more than his dignity. There have been many incidents recently of women cutting or biting off a man’s member out of jealousy. He could be next.

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ATM Burglar Loses Leg Trying to Escape

Gregory Daniels, 48, was arrested Tuesday after he and an accomplice used a chain and a pickup truck to pull a 1,500-pound ATM machine from Pomona Ranch Market in California.

At around 3 a.m., Daniels and another man broke a window at the market, wrapped a chain around the machine, and used the truck to yank it out from its spot. The two men loaded the ATM into the truck and drove off.

Officers chased after them until they drove into a dead-end street in a residential neighborhood.

Daniel’s partner in crime managed to get away on foot but when Daniels tried to flee, his prosthetic leg fell off.

He fell to the ground and the police officers easily arrested him.

The irony here is that Daniels was stealing the ATM to afford a more dependable prosthetic leg…

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German Couple Have Sex in Wrong Car

Let’s say you parked your car, left to do whatever you needed to do, and came back only to see a strange couple steaming up the back seat. What would you do?
A. Watch in secret (cause you can’t say no to free porn)
B. Unlock the door and yell, “what the hell?”
C. Unlock the door and ask if you can join in.

If you didn’t choose B, you must be pretty twisted!

So here’s the story. Bernhard Stadlinger,24, parked his sister’s car next to an identical car.

He went to a disco, met a girl, took her to what he thought was the car and began to have sex in it.

Petra Eichinger,42, walks to the parking lot, sees her car being violated, and in outrage, calls the police.

I bet they thought it was a prank call.

The woman had locked her doors but Stadlinger’s key happened to work on both cars. What are the chances?

I can’t believe he had intended to make the beast with two backs in his sister’s car. That’s just not right.

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Principal & Teacher Resign Over Sex Tape

Parents of children at Sandridge Elementary School, Lynwood, Illinois got an unwanted surprise in the mail this past week.

They received a package that contained a DVD featuring principal, Leroy Coleman and science teacher, Janet Lofton in various sexual encounters.

Parent Kim Grivakis said, “I was stunned and I felt sick to my stomach. I want to see this sheet of paper that says [Coleman] was fired- to let them know [he'll] never teach another child.”

Police believe one of the encounters on the tape may have occurred during school hours and are reviewing it to check if illegal acts were committed.

Coleman and Lofton have now resigned, citing personal reasons.

I wonder who mailed the DVD. It was probably an act of revenge.

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